Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Favorite Hangover Remedies.

In honor of my vow to cease drinking like someone who wants to obliterate his life and start "getting serious" about exam reading (2nd draft of the petition is in the works), I've decided to post my favorite hangover remedies, none of which work 100% of the time. In the order they occur to me:

1) Green tea w/ roasted brown rice.
This is a particular form of green tea which you brew with roast brown rice kernels in the tea. It has a really pleasant savory flavor and can settle an upset stomach well with the added bonus of a little caffeine to wake you up. A nice alternative to coffee on hangover mornings.

2) Brunch.
Usually consisting of pure proteins, eggs (choice of meats, or false meats), fried potatoes, toast, etc. This is actually a great meal if you are worried about the shits post-drinking because both proteins and carbs help solidify your stuff and absorb excess stomach acid.

3) Whining.
This one only applies to those with a roommate or partner who is in close proximity. Whining can offer some relief only insofar as the other person will sympathize, accomodate you, or bring you things.

4) 3 large glasses of water before bed.
This can really work to prevent the negative effects of hangovers like headaches and soreness. Unfortunately, when I need it the most I am usually passed-out or too drunk to remember it.

5) More sleep.
I can't sleep in anymore. I am getting old. Alack.

6) Alka-seltzer.
I am often of the upset stomach, nausea, starving-on-the-edge-of-my-life hungover variety and this little remedy brings much relief and a dose of pain-killer to my dehydrated, alcohol addled body, without the stomach upset brought about by taking ibuprofen or aspirin in the morning.

7) Procrastination.
Avoiding all work and commitments can help you get over your hangover faster.

8)Fluids of Choice: Seltzer/Sparkling Water/Gatorade
For settling stomachs and rehydration. Gatorade's flavor of watered-down cool-aid isn't hard to swallow for the touchy, formerly inebriated, sensitive stomach.

9) Small Glass of Orange Juice Before Bed:
I've heard this gets your liver working overnight to process the alcohol. The jury seems to be out on this one.

Please, feel free to comment with your experience with these remedies and any suggestions of your own.

Also, here is video of a powerfully inebriated man trying to buy beer:


Himself said...

The brunch and Gatorade suggestions have a common compound which is important to stress: salt.

Other things that are conspicuously absent here are:

1. hair of the dog – one shot or equivalent, no more; allegedly stimulates your body's alcohol-processing such that it gets rid of residual alcohol sitting around.

2. chilli – spicy food apparently has a similar effect.

Put all this shit together and you get a bloody mary.

All this stuff only deals with the alcohol component of a hangover, though. In years of not drinking, I've found that I still get most of the hangover, not from the alcohol, but from staying up too late. There's no cure for that, other than more sleep, which is easier said than done. Maybe some kind of sleeping tablet would be in order.

SkidMarquez said...

True, hair of the dog is important, but were you ever hung-over from wine? It's miserable, hot/cold-flashes.

John Foster Cartwright said...

Holy Shit.
That guy is AMAZING!

five said...

i don't like #3

SkidMarquez said...

Five, that's because you are often on the receiving end. But I think you employ #3 at times yourself.